LOL Parrot Jokes

I did a video the other day called Funny Parrot jokes, and so I thought, in honour of that video, today’s Heaps Of Jokes post should be about some LOL parrot jokes.

LOL Parrot Jokes Parrot & The Burglar

One peaceful night a burglar breaks into a house while the owners are out on the town. As he creeps through the family room, shining his torch on the floor, he hears a voice say, “Jesus is watching you!”

He stops and nervously looks around and not seeing anything he shakes his head and continued to look for valuables. Again, he hears that voice, “Jesus is watching you!” He stops again and shines his flashlight all over the room until the light rests on a parrot. Looking at the parrot, he asks, “Did you say that?”

“I did,” said the parrot, “I’m just trying to warn you that Jesus is watching.”

“You’re trying to warn me”, asked the burglar? “You’re just a parrot. So, tell me, parrot, do you have a name?”lol parrot jokes

“Sure, it’s Moses.”

“Moses? Why would your stupid owners give you such a lame name, Moses indeed!” said the burglar.

The parrot shrugs his wings and replies, “I don’t know, I suppose for the same reason they named their huge black rottweiler Jesus.

LOL Parrot Jokes Meet Religion

A female parishioner goes to her priest one day saying, “Father, could you please help me with a problem I’m having. You see, I’ve acquired two female parrots who only know how to say one thing.”

“What is it that they say,” enquired the priest?”

“They say, ‘Hi, we’re prostitutes, would you like to have some fun?” replied the parishioner embarrassingly.

“I have to admit, that’s pretty obscene, and I can just imagine how embarrassed that must make you feel,” said the priest. After some thought the priest said, “I think I may have a solution for your dilemma. I happen to have two male parrots that I’ve taught to pray and to read the Bible. I think you should bring your parrots over to my house and we’ll put them in a cage with Francis and Job so they can teach your parrots to praise and worship. I’m sure that with a little time your parrots will stop saying that obnoxious phrase.”

“Thank you, thank you so, so much” the lady responded. “This may very well be the solution I’ve been praying for.”

The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest’s house. As he ushered her in, she saw his two male parrots inside their cage, holding their rosary beads and praying. She was very impressed as she walked over and placed her parrots in with them. After just a couple of seconds, the female parrots exclaimed out in unison, “Hi, we’re prostitutes. Would you like to have some fun?” There was a stunned silence. Finally, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and said, “Put the beads away, Francis, our prayers have been answered!”



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